A close, intimate partnership can be one of life’s great joys and comforts, but when it’s not going well, it can also cause us great suffering, pain and confusion.
When you come and meet with me as a couple, my primary aim is to create a space for you, quite simply, to share what’s going on between you both, and how you’re each currently experiencing the relationship.
In my work with couples, I regularly see that many struggles result from our difficulties in being vulnerable or in accepting our partner’s vulnerabilities and imperfections. My goal and hope is that the therapy space will allow you to (re-)connect with your innate ability to be gentle and kind with each other, through listening, attention, time and respect for your inevitable differences.
Being vulnerable can feel extremely uncomfortable, particularly if we grew up in a family or environment which didn’t encourage it. To express vulnerability, it’s essential that we feel safe. In the therapy room, I aim to create and hold this space for you as a couple in the hope of you experiencing something which will encourage you to share from your heart and understand each other better.
It’s commonly understood that we learn patterns of intimacy at an early age and that we often carry on these ways of interacting in our intimate relationships. Sometimes, this doesn’t cause problems and can work very well, but sometimes, we may find that old patterns or hurts are causing problems in the present.
In therapy, I will help you to identify any such patterns by gaining greater awareness and insight into how you’re interacting with each other. In this way, together we can identify what’s working and what feels good (or what has done so in the past), as well as what you’re struggling with and what you would like or need to improve between you. All this is in the hope that the unique connection between you can continue to grow and flourish.
As I’ve completed Levels 1 & 2 of the Gottman Method Couples Therapy (see www.gottman.com), I will often use exercises and interventions from this method, to guide and support you in finding more effective ways of connecting and communicating with one another.
My Fees for Couples Therapy
My fee for the session lasting 70-75 minutes is €120. A couples session takes place on a weekly or every other weekly basis (to be agreed at the start of the therapy process).